Monthly Archives: July 2010

Dear Heather,

I’ve spent a lot of time stuck in traffic lately. I mean BAD traffic. Traffic that doesn’t move for ten minutes at a time. Sometimes in ninety degree heat while my A/C isn’t working and I’m convinced my car will overheat at the worst possible moment. (Thankfully it hasn’t.)

I’ve spent a considerable amount of that time stuck in traffic next to, in front of, diagonal to, and right behind motorcycles that looks just like yours.

Every single time I see one, my heart breaks for you. The scene of your accident — that I obviously couldn’t have seen — flashes before my eyes and I feel like I can’t breathe. My mind plays it like a movie, over and over. It makes my stomach hurt.

It’s been almost one year; I can’t believe it. I miss you and I still can’t believe you’re gone.They say if a person dies in a great tragedy they often stick around. Well, if you’re here, I hope you know how missed you are.

It’s too bad you aren’t here; you would have laughed your ass off at the story of what I just did this afternoon. And I totally wish you were here to help me figure out what I should go to school for.What the heck am I good at? What would best suit me as a career?

Sigh. Of course you can’t answer. I just wish you were here, that’s all.

I’m sending my love to wherever you are (and hoping you’re reading this as I type).

Love you always,
Ester

I just realized that 98% of the TV shows I watch are non-fiction. I’m pretty proud of that fact.

Sam, while watching Into the Wormhole:

“Dark matter… it’s the butt hole of the universe!”

I’ve been given a blog award by the ladies of The Narcissists’ Diary — thanks for the shout-out, girls! What a fun thing to wake up to this morning. =]

(I really love the graphic for this award; isn’t it just adorable? It reminds me of passing notes in middle school.)

Blog Award Instructions:
- Write a post on your blog about the award.
- Choose 5 bloggers to pass it on to.
- Then, of course, let them know you’ve given it to them!

Here are the top 5 blogs I especially look forward to reading:

1. Yarn Harlot
2. Surviving Motherhood in the Last Frontier
3. PDX Princess
4. Nuclear Knits
5. Perez Hilton
   

With all of my free time lately, I’ve been knitting like a mad woman. Though I’ve yet to pick up my 2-years-and-counting Central Park Hoodie that has sat in Time Out for the past month, I did eventually grow bored after knitting my fourth dishcloth in a week.

During my short dishcloth obsession, something strange happened — I fell in love with cotton.

Normally, I detest knitting with dishcloth cotton as it does feel a bit brash, especially compared to my undying loyalty to the 8th wonder of the world — the unbelievably soft Malabrigo wool. But somehow, my fourth dishcloth left me wondering if cotton could be softer; maybe a cotton blend plied with a much softer fiber.

Before picking out which cotton yarn to try, I decided on a cute lace tank top, the Heart Lace Top. (*FREE knitting pattern altert!)

I ended up buying 3 skeins of Lion Brand’s Cotton Ease (a cotton/acrylic blend; significantly softer than 100% cotton), and so far I’m impressed. Though the color is less than what I was hoping for — I’d have loved a dark, rich purple like the photo on the pattern page — but it was the best of the choices at hand. Because I don’t normally wear such light colors, I plan to knit or crochet a black border along the bottom and I’ll knit the bodice and straps in black as well.

My progress photo doesn’t look like much, but I’ve knit another inch or two since last night when the picture was taken. My goal is to finish the tank by the end of our next race weekend in a few weeks.

I don’t have a great track record when it comes to finishing new projects in a timely manner, but a girl can hope… right?

For the past week or two I’ve felt relieved. I thought I’d made a final decision. I was finally giving my lifelong dream of being a licensed Cosmetologist a rightful chance. I was going for it — chasing my dream. That is, until a few days ago.

Let’s start with some back story.

I’ve been THISCLOSE to starting beauty school twice now; a few years ago I even went so far as to pay the admission fee to officially enroll. But in the end, when it came right down to it, Sam and I realized it just wasn’t financially feasible at the time. The week before my first day of class, I called the admissions department at the beauty school I’d chosen and politely retracted my approved application. The whole situation was just stressful.

Fast forward to a few weeks ago and the steady 9-5′r I’ve held for the past 3.5 years suddenly came to an end. After basking in the awesomeness that is not having a job for a few days, I sat down and really started to think about what I want to do with myself in this one life I’m living — was I going to continue working desk jobs for little pay or was I going to progress myself into a position where I both earn and deserve a better living than I was making before?

The choice seemed an obvious one, but the decision-making part has proved quite difficult.

I’m hesitant to make a final decision, and I keep putting it off. I’ve toured countless schools, met with numerous counselors and financial aid advisers, and I even have 2 more schools left to tour, but no one else is going to make my mind up for me. This is my life we’re talking about here; my career; my way of contributing and supporting myself.

And the way I see it, if I’m going to change anything at all, I either change it like WHOA or not change it at ALL. Go big or go home.

And that’s where I feel like I’m at right now — I’m looking straight ahead, but there’s no road in front of me. To the left is the road to beauty, fashion, and a snobby, gossip and money-driven lifestyle that I just don’t quite fit. To the right is the endless possibility of “regular” college - graphics designer, web designer, documentary filmmaker, best-selling author (hey, we can all dream, right?), who knows where I’d end up - all I have to do is make the decision.

In my best Chris Rock voice, “Man, why decisions gotta be so damn hard to make?”

I’ve talked before about the Day Zero Project, a free website where you can set up a list of 101 things you want to do over the next 1,001 days. (You can find my list here.) I’ve been working on my list over the past couple of months, and so far I’ve crossed 23 things off my list:

1. Get my sewing machine fixed and make something — a drawstring bag, a full size apron, and a t-shirt recon skirt
2. Go camping
3. Go on a road trip
4. Visit the zoo
5. No fast food for 1 month — going on 2 months now
6. Buy a lottery ticket — obviously I didn’t win
7. Avoid Starbucks for 1 week
8. Try a food I’ve never eaten before – fresh cherries at a Farmer’s Market
9. Answer all 50 Questions That Will Free Your Mind — while mildly amusing to fill out, these questions didn’t actually do any mind-freeing
10. Throw a birthday party for myself
11. Write a list of 100 Things That Make Me Happy
12. Inspire someone to make a Day Zero list
13. Do a cartwheel
14. Convert to vegetarianism — best decision I’ve ever made
15. Say yes to something I would normally say no to
16. Pay for the person behind me in line
17. Learn to make 1 really great meal from scratch
18. Purposely leave my phone turned off for 24 hours
19. Knit a pair of socks for a loved one
20. Knit something to donate
21. Buy something from LimeCrime
22. Bake cupcakes for no reason
23. Experience a laser light show — Nirvana at OMSI

With 935 days left to complete the remaining 78 tasks including drinking nothing but water for 4 weeks, sending a secret to PostSecret, and getting my palm read my a psychic, I’m happily optimistic about my shrinking to-do list.

Anyone else have your own Day Zero list? If so, I’d love to check it out!

It’s been chilly the past few days, but today’s forecast looks much warmer. And tomorrow and Sunday? Let’s just say they’ll likely be sweltering. Here’s hoping a visit to a natural body of water is in my very near future!

Like millions of other women out there, I enjoyed reading the Twilight series. Last month Sam bought me the newest Stephanie Meyer novel, The Short Second Life of Bree Tanner. Unfortunately, at the time I was in the middle of another book, Twenties Girl by Sophie Kinsella. I’ve never been one to read more than one book at a time, so I didn’t start reading my new book until now.

I’m nearly finished with the book about Bree, one of the newborn vampires bred by Victoria to help fight the Cullen’s at the end of the third book in the Twilight series, Eclipse. I found the change of narration to be a breath of fresh air. Bree’s personality is completely different from selfish, indecisive Bella; and how Bree views the world is drastically different from the older, more experienced vampires the Twilight series revolves around.

I’m not sure how it ends quite yet, but as the title gives away I know Bree does not live to see the end of the book. I’m looking forward to reading how it all goes down, but I’m also looking forward to stopping at Powell’s Books after my lunch date with a BFF so I can pick out a new book to read.

It’s amazing how much time I have these days now that I’m not working! It’s incredible!

Sweet little Wednesday; though she’s beyond adorable in real life, she’s just not photogenic. At all. In every picture we take, she somehow manages to look as if a demon has possessed her eyes. It’s really terrifying, honestly.

Behold the photo I managed to take today, as Wens basked in the sunshine on her favorite window sill. And she doesn’t even look like the spawn of satan. I’m so proud!